There are certain things that irk me to an amazing degree.  Lying is one of them.  A lot of people know this, and it has become a joke among the fraternity, but I can't stand it when people lie.  Even little white ones.  Joking is one thing, lying is another. 

The act of lying doesn't make sense to me.  Why lie?  Some people say it is okay if it the truth were to hurt someone's feelings.  Just be honest!  What if you lie now and they find out the truth soon after that from someone else?  What then?  That just causes more drama.  Be open and honest, and also open-minded enough to take that openness and honesty.  We don't need any more hypocrites here in the world.

I'd have to say whining is next up on the list.  It doesn't get anything done.  There is probably a fine line between venting and whining, which I probably define a lot more strictly than most.  Venting usually has a purpose to it.  Stress relief, a way to look for different perspectives or solutions on a subject, and other useful reasons.  Whining, though, is not trying to do anything about an issue.  Just work to fix it.  Or ignore it.  Whatever you have to do in the long run.

Third, I would have to say is lack of appreciation.  You know, when people don't recognize and value the many blessings they have in their lives.  Friends, family, material objects, spirituality, whatever.  They are all awesome, especially if we take the time to cherish them. 

I've just been reflecting a lot this morning, especially after such an exciting and fun weekend and all.  You could say I'm going through a mini-depression I guess.  The "post-social" blues.  I should write a song about it. 

It is the end of our spring break and I must say that it was a blast!  Between work, spending some quality rest and recreation time at home, and catching up on sleep, it was quite productive.

I would like to give thanks and praise to the sisters of Chi Sigma Phi for coming up from Southern California, Cal Poly Pomona, Cal State Fullerton, and Cal State Los Angeles, to be exact.  Janette, Sandy, Maggie, and Danielle you all rock!  We hope you had a good time.  Don't be strangers now!

We went ice skating again, and I am getting better and a little more confident on the ice.  My biggest improvement was catalyzed by a quick lesson from a sister of alpha Kappa Delta Phi, Dianna.

We also hit up a house party in Sacramento where I ended up seeing some old high school friends and was basically inundated by the need for us to get a fraternity house. 

I went to two brotherhood events also to cap off the week, one to watch the Oakland A's play the Sacramento Rivercats in an exhibition game.  This was my first time watching a baseball game.  Pretty awesome, if I do say so myself.  After that, I went to my brother's house to watch Wrestlemania XIX and barbecue with the bros.

I'm so juiced right now, I feel great!  I don't know how other people get so tired so fast and it ultimately takes them away from responsibilities that go along with being in positions of leadership.  Maybe I take my work too seriously, but I do think that what we do is a big part of who we are.  Separating business and pleasure doesn't make sense to me, because business is pleasure to me.  I just love what I do.  Am I too ambitious?  Am I too hard on myself?  I don't know.  I do know that I want to accomplish all that I can in my relatively brief period in the world.

My lola arrived in Sacramento yesterday, and I found out why she wanted to come back.  Apparently she became ill over there and it was to the point that she could not stand anymore.  She fell and hurt her head.  She said it was bleeding and so she felt more comfortable here because of the superior health care.  I hope here she'll feel better.  As long as she's happy, I'm willing to do anything. 

Like I was telling one of my brothers, Chi Rho Omicron, is really the only family I have left that I can lean on when I need to.  I sometimes forget that other brothers have their biological families still around and that they owe their parents all that they have.  Independence has had that effect on me.  It's somewhat of a dangerous thing.  I have to remember to put myself in their shoes more often. 

Talagang Krayzee!

Spring break has been relaxing yes, but most people would have said that I was busy.  I got to have a few reunions over meals, catch up on some conference projects at work, clean up around the house, which I've been putting off for way too long, as well as soak in life and the beauty of spring.

I've found that by staying busy people don't have much time to be discontent.  If you learn to love what you do, how can you lose?  So often our perspectives end up determining our happiness.  Of course, we all have our down times, but even when you're down, it shouldn't undermine all that you do. 

I think that's part of the reason that I feel as confident and as good as I do.  I find myself getting carried away sometimes, because sometimes, I do feel like the best.  Jerry Rice once said, "Sometimes, I do feel like the best.  But you'll never catch me saying it."  A true professional.  Calm, collected at all times.  Nothing seems to phase him.  That's poise.  More people need more of it. 

The week is going by too fast.  Spring break is ending way too quick.  It will be cool to see everyone again.  My friends and I have jokingly determined that I have an eye for fashion, hence my infatuation with hair and clothing.

These are probably all remnants of how my mom went to cosmetology school, that Fong was an aspiring fashion designer when we were together, and that I have quite a few friends in the textiles and design field of study or work.

They say you are your ten best friends.  That you are very similar to the ten people you associate with the most.  That is so true.  When you hang around a group of people, you pick up on their tendencies, from key phrases, to even certain physical movements that they perform.  It's not outright mimicry, but it is modeling in a sense.

What we must decide is perhaps how we are valuable, rather than how valuable we are.  So I've been asking around.  What makes me special? 

I've gotten a varied amount of responses.  Shallow things from you're entertaining all the way to you have an insight that brings out the best in people.  I think that last one is a little bit far fetched.

Motivation and charisma has always seemed to be my weakness when it comes to leadership.  Part of it is the whole public speaking thing.  You can't move people without speaking. 

Top of the World

You don't know it, but

Sometimes, I go to a hill that overlooks
the landscape's mask of city lights
For a sip of momentary grace.
On this brink of everything I know, I can gain
An eyeful of the lost Atlantis in the human soul,
And a breath that fills my lungs with the air between two stars.

If right now, you
Were to capture this elation
In the framework of your mind,
Or find transcendance through these words,
Then at most you would know
Nothing
Of the beauty your existence throws to me.
For mine is a love no experience,
No thought, no measure, no words
Could ever degrade into reality by virtue of degree.

The weather was brilliant today.  Simply ravishing!  I took a stroll in Capitol Park today, and just looked at the memorials and the calmness of the park.  It was really peaceful and relaxing.  Nature is an amazing thing.  I'm not just talking about the environment.  I mean to include the naturalness of being human.

Think about the innocence of a newborn.  We can feel love, happiness, sadness, or anger.  We haven't learned how to feel embarrassed, or guilty, or ashamed.  That's the way we are meant to be.  All natural.

I still contend that natural beauty is the greatest.  The best medium for that to shine through is through your personality and demeanor.  Actions speak volumes about a person, and are great indicators of a person's character.

Have people forgotten how to smile?  People walk around with these scowls, or zombie like countenances.  Why?  Enjoy life.  Find things that make you smile.  I try all the time.  I don't think that most people enjoy their lives enough.  There are so many awesome events in each of our lives, that if we don't smile, then we don't appreciate all of the blessings.  If we don't appreciate, we don't deserve.  More often than not, you'll find that people don't get what they want, they get what they deserve.  And only we can determine what we deserve.  How?  By showing appreciation.  It's simple. 

Ahh the power of the media.

The sprinkling of the news reports is also showing that resistance is going up in Iraq.  It's expected though right?  Who would give up control of their homeland?  There apparently are some tensions among the troops and a little bit of dissent.  We'll have to see how that plays out.  The media has been broadcasting from within Humvees and taking pictures of meetings in order to record everything.  I guess they are agents of history now too.

I'm watching the Academy Awards right now, and suddenly, I have this humongous urge to watch Chicago.  It must be a good movie right?  It was nominated for all kinds of awards.  If anyone wants to see it with me, just let me know.  What I am particularly impressed with are those recipients and hosts that demonstrate such grace and class.  For example, Peter O'Toole and Sean Connery, two very classy gentlemen.  Steve Martin, as a host, was particularly entertaining and professionally brief.  Also, big ups to people my pal Marshall on getting best song for "Lose Yourself" on 8 Mile.  Oh to be an actor or in any field for that matter and receive an award of that magnitude.  It must be amazing.

One day.  I know one of us will be there.  And I'll be right there cheering. 

Woo hoo!

After one evening of celebrating aging gracefully, I am going to repeat the process, because one good turn deserves another.

I do have to say, I have the greatest and most sincere friends and brothers in the world.  They are truly family to me, and although I miss my mom and lola, I can't imagine life any other way.

I don't think that anyone that knew me in high school would have imagined me being a brother in a fraternity.  I imagine that some people that know me now wonder why I am in a fraternity.  To be honest, you wouldn't know either, unless you were part of a fraternity or a sorority.  There are all kinds of fraternal organizations out there, each one distinct from each other, yet similar in some respect. 

There are all kinds of stereotypes out there, and if you believe any of them, before even checking any fraternities or sororities out, then you are being prejudiced.

For example, I recall someone saying that they did not want people to think that they were "shaped by the fraternity."  It's funny, because if you want all the credit for being different or for being cool, then you are selfish.  You don't want to acknowledge the people that have served as your role models and as your inspiration.  From that alone, you don't belong in a fraternity.  You can, in your own mind, be your own individual.

I am an individual in a strong brotherhood, and one that I am proud to be a part of.  I brought with me certain strengths and weaknesses, and where I contributed my strengths, my weaknesses became less of a handicap, through the brotherhood. 

My character will speak for itself when it comes to people judging me and what I am a part of. 

If today is your birthday: Continue to focus on the financial goals you've set.  Sticking with a tough program gets easier with practice.  At first you'll do it just because you said you would.  As you go on, the rewards become more obvious and make it all worthwhile.

Aries (March 21-April 19) - Today is a 7 out of 10 - Your energy is increasing, but it's more of a stressful kind than the easygoing stride you prefer.  Be careful not to overexert yourself out of competititiveness.

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." - Eleanor Roosevelt

"When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us." - Helen Keller

Happy Birthday to the one and only!

Now on to bigger issues at hand.  There were 500,000 Arab casualties from Operation Desert Storm.  Saddam Hussein had invaded Kuwait in an attempt to take it over.  The United States went into that war with the support of the United Nations and its Security Council to liberate Kuwait.

From the end of that war until now, a certain cadre of politicians has pushed for a regime change in Iraq.  This is similar to the ideas for regime change in North Korea and Cuba.  They push for it to attempt to establish stronger ties to Israel, of whom we have been strong allies with, through a similar form of government, as Stanley Karnov has said about the Philippines, in our own image.  The attempt is to protect Israel from the ongoing tensions and enhance Israel security.

When the terrorist attacks occured on September 11, 2001, the strategy changed from just trying to oust a regime to tying in the attacks as well.  Does anyone remember the searching for the Al Qaeda and Osama Bin Laden?  The attacks on the barracks in Beirut were similar in that these were attacks on American assets to drive the military out of Saudi Arabia, and allow Osama Bin Laden to take control more easily.  George Bush talked about fighting terrorism.  What was to be a war against terror has turned into this.  To find a scapegoat, not necessarily because he was tied to the attacks, or that he had weapons of mass destruction, but because it fell in line with the idea of regime change. 

The United Nations edict calls for disarmament.  It does not say to use all forms of power like mobilizing 250,000 United States troops and upwards of $200 billion dollars.  I don't know.  I don't think democracy should be upheld and enforced at gunpoint. 

I'm not convinced this is all for oil.  Saudi Arabia and Kuwait have much larger oil stores not to mention Russia and some of its neighboring countries.  I'm not even convinced this is an issue that Junior has taken up for Senior.  I do think however, the president's image is at stake.

When the United States is no longer a superpower, how will the superpower of that time treat us?  Even the greatest empires had to cut their losses, like the Roman empire when it brought back the Plague.  The Aztec empire was vast and far reaching, but even they grew too large to control.  We can only see how our treatment of foreign nations will pan out. 

As far as the protestors, God knows I agree with you.  War is not the answer in and of itself.  However, we are hurting our own reputation and the people who are in power will not take us as seriously as if we engaged in the type of movements that the great civil rights leaders did.  Those movement were coalition based, and broad coalitions at that.  The fact that they were done before are all the more reason that they can be done again.  Let us all move together in the right direction.