It looks like my position at work with conference planning is secure.  I really like it there, and I also learn a lot about the logistics of setting up such large scale events.  This will be really helpful if I work on any weddings or reunions and what not. 

I also want to go get better at tending bar and get a broker's license.  These are all goals and skills that I can put to good use.  How else am I going to make my millions, other than winning the lottery or winning some slot machine jackpot? 

After work today, I looked over more stuff for the Filipino American Youth Leadership Conference (FAYLC).  As I sorted through the participant's applications who would be in Sarah and my tribe, I noticed a huge varied background for all of them.  I have to note one of them.  Her name is Gennelle Cordova, or GG for short.  She is the granddaughter of famous Filipino American historians Mr. and Mrs. Cordova, both very well known members of the Filipino American National Historical Society.  I'm nervous because she is coming all the way down from Seattle, Washington.  I also have tribe members coming from Union City, Davis, Sacramento, and Elk Grove, a total of fourteen in all. 

Sarah and I will try to keep things fun if they aren't having fun themselves.  A little push from us won't hurt.  We have participants as young as eighth graders and as old as college freshmen.  That's the whole spectrum of the age range that can attend.  Not only that, we have veterans of the conference as well as a lot of virgins to the conference.  It should make things interesting.  Sarah and my goal is to keep things moving and flowing and productive.

I was reading in the paper how Kobe Bryant did have sex with that woman that accused him of raping her.  He admitted it to his wife and went out to buy her a $4 million diamond ring.  I guess he felt bad.  All I can do is shake my head. 

See, I wonder what would make women more mad.  Being cheated on, or someone trying to buy their forgiveness.  To me, all of it's a shame.  Call me a hopeless romantic, but I do believe in true love.  I believe that a relationship should be consummated in trust and honesty first.  Yes, gifts are nice.  Yet a gift cannot replace a stong, healthy relationship.

I have to admit, I sure think like a romantic.  It's not easy, but it is easier than not having any hope at all.

I sure am glad I went to Alex's wedding.  There were a lot of brothers from Sacramento, and we had a blast.  I explained to him why I was late and he was appreciative that I had made it.  Ultimately, it was a good choice to go.  I not only had, fun, but I added to the reasons for them to be happy.

I had a really deep conversation with one of the bros at the end of the night.  I swear alcohol makes some people seem smarter, because they feel freer to express themselves.  I know you've met people that have a lot of insight, but don't really talk because they are shy or something.  When you get them to open up though, they show you a whole new perspective on life.  I love it. 

On the way home I was thinking a lot.  No music, just my thoughts and the sound of the road rumbling underneath the tires of my Pathfinder.  My mom's hospice nurse said that the body starts to prepare itself for death, just before my mom passed.  I was wondering if my own body was doing anything like that.  I've been so introspective and retrospective lately.  At the counselor training one of the advisors used my death as an example of something that people could rally behind.  Is it a sign?  Who knows?  Who cares?  I do my best with every moment of my life.  I don't think that there any other way to live it and feel satisfied.

Another fun-filled weekend!  Friday after work, I just relaxed, put on a couple of DVD's and worked on more theater and acting concepts, going through materials, and analyzing in general.  It was some much needed time to develop my soul.

On Saturday morning I got up, and went with Rhod and Chi to the Brown Ribbon Campaign launching in Union Square of San Francisco.  The Brown Ribbon Campaign is a campaign launched by a coalition including Student Action for Veterano Equity (SAVE), the SF Veteran's Equity Center (VEC), and other groups to lobby for the passage of the Veteran's Equity Bill. 

The Veteran's Equity Bill asks to strike the Recission Act of 1946, which took away the rights and benefits of over 700,000 men and women who fought in World War II under the United States Armed Forces in the Far East (USAFFE).  These heroes, aren't recognized as retired veterans or even ex-veterans.  They don't receive health care, a veteran's pension, or even burial benefits.  Five to seven veterans die a day, and there are only about 11,000 left.  Yet the government refuses to acknowledge their work.

So this is where we are today.  HR 677 is the bill that is before the House of Representatives this year.  We also need a bill to be presented in the Senate in order for real justice to triumph.

I was given a ribbon at the rally.  I am going to wear it until full veteran's equity is finally given.  Many of us are going to.  If you need more information, let me know.  I want us to make a difference.  I can't do this alone.  I could use your help too.  We are writing letters, collecting signatures for petitions, doing whatever we can to ensure that people own up to their responsibilities.  SAVE has shirts that they are selling for $15.

After the rally, we met up with more brothers that had come from Kababayan Day at Marine World.  They were supporting a brother that was emceeing the event, as well as representing for the brotherhood.  We ate at a restaurant and celebrated Dennis' birthday.

I got back around 2300 to Sacramento and went to an overnight retreat for the ate/kuya counselors for next weeks Filipino American Youth Leadership Conference.  We worked on our facilitation skills and went over how to best tackle the program that was in store for us.  We watched a couple training videos and did a lot of hands on training and simulating.  I got to know my counterparts a lot more and am really impressed by them.

We got done about 1500 hrs today, and I am going to get ready for a wedding for my brother Alex Malana.  I am really late though and I considered not going.  However, that just wouldn't be me.  I have to own up to the fact that I'm late, not just run away and make up some worthless excuse.

Okay, okay.  A tattoo is not the answer.  I didn't get one.  I realized that getting a tattoo was a just a way for me to distract myself from the situation at hand.  Some people buy shoes, some people smoke, some people blend.  I was planning to get a tattoo.  Fortunately, I didn't have a design ready. 

The last thing I want to do is get a tattoo that has doesn't have any significant meaning.  My body is a canvas from which I want to exude emotion, interaction, and reflection.  My actions and thoughts work synchroniously to count out the hours, minutes, seconds that I have left to fulfill my meaning in life.

The future is not written.  There is no fate but what we make.  It's an interesting concept.  Yet there is one reality that we all face.  All of us will ultimately endure a physical death.  It is an inevitability.

Hence, I believe rather, that there are a few events predetermined in our lives that we must endure.  I don't believe that the powers that be know when they will occur, or to what degree they occur, nor our reaction to those occurences.  They only know if we will survive them in order to face our next predetermined event.  All roads shall lead to certain events in our lives, unique to each individual, and unlike any before them. 

Maybe I'll write a book.

I feel like something is missing from my life.  I can't really put my finger on it as to what it is, and it is on my mind constantly, if not at the forefront, it's somewhere in the back of my mind, ready to spring forth like a jack-in-the-box.  It's not one of those longing pains, or even the sharp pain that makes your stomach churn, like when you've lost a loved one or broken up with your significant other.  I'd liken it to that feeling you get when you know that something just isn't right.  You, know, it's that feeling when you go back to a certain place, and you get the feeling that something has changed, that it's just not the same.  Or that feeling when you talk to someone that you haven't seen in a long time and the two of you just don't see eye-to-eye anymore.  It's not that they've changed for the worse, or that you've changed for the worse, but rather that you've both changed for the better, but the better for each of you is in different directions. 

Maybe I just want another tattoo.

If everyone just did their part, the world would be such a better place.  It's simple.  Do your work, clean up after yourself, be polite to others.  The only problem is that what is simple to do, is also simple not to do.  More often than not, people want to take the easy way out, and not throw away their trash, or take care of business.  They'd rather take advantage of someone else, and when that happens, resentment starts to grow, and this leads to more problems and more issues.  It all starts with each of us as individuals. 

As far as all the problems that the world is having, if we each did our part, the world would be a better place. 

I need to do a bit of self-reflecting.  I need to somewhat reorganize myself and reevaluate what I'm doing and how I do things.  I feel like I'm falling into my old ways of overcommitting myself and just being totally ineffective.  I also need to learn to step back from the brotherhood, as I'm not a key player anymore.  I have to just learn to adapt to my "I'll help when you ask for it" role.  It's different being passive.  I plan to be active in other ways, especially with the establishment of Chi Rho Omicron Inc. 

I got some really good news at work today.  They are moving up in rank and I am working directly for the Conference Planning Director.  It's pretty cool.  I hopefully will get to do more traveling and negotiating, which means some major networking.  I really am not sure how it will affect me and my duties, but I think it's a step in the right direction.